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For some companies, learning to live in 'the experience economy' has been difficult. While the usual suspects of marketing excellence are held aloft as exemplars for them to emulate, many remain intimidated, alienated and disengaged by the machinations of such mega-marketers. In response to a recent call to capture the harsh reality of subjective and personal customer experience, we attempt to reengage the estranged by chronicling the customer experience offering of the late Lewis's department store. To this end, we introduce subjective personal introspection into the services marketing literature. The tragicomedy of Lewis's downfall told here, is based on our rigorous analysis and interpretation of multiple customer introspections that detail its truly appalling customer experience offering.